Showing posts with label Grace Episcopal Church. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grace Episcopal Church. Show all posts

Saturday, January 25, 2020

Bob Malm: Club Protest Membership Countdown


By virtue of trying to shutdown criticism by going to court with his facially false claims that he had been threatened, pseudo-priest Bob Malm signed up for the two-year membership at Club Protest. No refunds, late payments result in an extension of membership. And his decision to include Mike in his vendetta, his multiple lies in court, and his efforts to subpoena a dying woman, all mean Bob gets the special VIP add-on package — my online presence will continue ad infinitum. That’s right, Dysfunctional Bob gets the lifetime virtual membership. Hey, Bob always did think he was special. Well, he’s right.

So, this countdown timer doesn’t mark the countdown to an end to open hostilities. But it does mark the payout of Dysfunctional Bob’s basic Club Protest membership.That said, I have always believed in under-promise, over-deliver, so I also will no doubt extend Bob’s basic membership well beyond his original contract.

Hey, if he behaves, maybe we can even spot Bob some core body fitness tips. Heaven knows he’s been looking rather well-fed in recent years. And it fits — Grace Church aka St. Dysfunction is looking a whole lot leaner and meaner these days.

See you at Dysfunction Junction aka Malm Square(d)!

Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Check it Out: More Defamation from Lindsey Malm

Wonder if Lindsey realizes that the statue of limitations under Virginia state law is one year from publication? 

Of course, the larger issue is that you only have to look at the children if you want to learn about the parents. So when Bob Malm prattles on with the rhetorical question, “Will our children have faith?”, the answer in his case is that they don’t. Moreover, the values one sees in Lindsey are likely values she learned at home.

Another damning indictment of Bob Malm, Leslie Malm, and Grace Church.




Monday, March 18, 2019

More on Grace Church’s HVAC Project

With the general, HVAC, and mechanical contractors now in place for Grace Church’s HVAC project, there are two outstanding issues, both of which may affect the church for years to come. To my knowledge, neither has been satisfactorily answered, either by Bob Malm, or the vestry. Yet both warrant further thought and reflection.

First is the issue of the church subsidizing school operations by doing without pastoral and other resources. Yes, Bob Malm is wildly overpaid, particularly given his feckless job performance. But that’s besides the point. As things stand, the only way the church can cover the expenses associated with this project is to hold off on the assistant rector position for as long as possible, and to otherwise cut overhead. That is not good, especially given that Dysfunctional Bob must, under the canons, retire within the next four years. In short, this is a time to strengthen community, and shifting resources away from that goal can only have negative consequences.

Also appalling is that poorly compensated employees, including the sexton and office staff, face regressive taxation as part of these efforts at cost reduction. The church can afford to walk away from $100,000 in debt that Bob Malm owed it, but it can no longer afford to pay the total cost of health insurance for its employees? How does that work? Moreover, Pedro negotiated his compensation package based on the notion that the church would cover his family insurance. Unless the church addressed that issue in its plans, it has double-crossed Pedro and his family. So much for social justice.

Of course, that also raises the larger question of why parishioners should do without pastoral care in order to pay for the AC. The school produces no obvious benefit to the church and already enjoys the subsidy of the 50/50 split on non-fungible costs, despite the fact that it consumes the lion’s share of utilities. Overhead already is much too high with Bob’s ridiculous compensation package, as well as its penchant for full-time employees. So why are people stepping up their pledges to make ends meet, when hundreds of thousands of dollars are going in support of a quasi-independent entity that, over the years, has shown scant respect for the church?

My take on things is that asking parishioners to do without in order to air condition the school is a recipe for long-term trouble, likely to build resentment over time. For years, Chris Byrnes played her empire-building games, yet now it’s suddenly “your school,” in communications with parishioners? Hot dog—Bob must think people have really short memories.

Second is the issue of AC in the nave and undercroft themselves. Woefully inadequate and inefficient in both areas, the compressor is much too large in the undercroft, while there is not nearly enough capacity in the nave. Moreover, air flow in the nave ducts is inadequate for the space and relevant load. Yet these issues are being ignored, despite the fact that the school’s use of the nave, expressed as a percentage of total use, is commensurate with the church’s use of Merrow Hall. But the school is not planning to help fund work on these areas. As a result, the church is uncomfortable for summer weddings, funerals, and other command performances—hardly helpful when the church already is shedding pledging units and members. Thus, one must question why the church is going in debt to pay for HVAC in Merrow Hall, when no thought has been given to its own HVAC woes. And again, all within the context of a $100,000 bonus for Bob Malm—a thoroughly undeserving recipient if there ever was one. Keep in mind, too, that both compressors, the one for the undercroft and the one for the nave, are past actuarial end of life. And being 20-ton units, neither will be cheap to replace. If either fails during the life of the HVAC loan, it’s going to be a tough squeeze to find a solution.

Exacerbating these issues is the fact that financing the HVAC work in the manner currently envisioned prevents funding of issues of primary importance to the church, but secondary importance to the school. For example, neither elevator, nor the parking lot entrance, meet modern handicapped accessibility standards. While probably not a huge deal to the school, the aging population at the church already struggles to access some parts of the building. Similarly, interior directional signage is non-ADA compliant, as it does not include Braille. Thus, persons with limited visual acuity would find Grace church a daunting environment, with its long hallways, numerous doors, and multiple levels. In addition, lighting is woefully inadequate in the third floor hallway, as well as the basement-level stairs outside the church office.

In short, while the vendors chosen for the work are reputable and likely will do an excellent job on the project, the current approach to the project almost guarantees further woes for the church at a time when it’s already in precipitous decline and facing a “lame duck” and largely indifferent rector.

Not good.


Saturday, March 16, 2019

Handling of Sexual Misconduct Allegations at National Cathedral Stands in Marked Contrast to the Diocese of Virginia

According to WTOP, the schools at the National Cathedral have expanded their investigation into potential sexual misconduct to include two additional schools operating on the premises, co-ed Beauvoir School and the all-girls National Cathedral School. The original investigation only involved St. Albans boy’s school and started over allegations of inappropriate activity by Vaughn Keith, a teacher at the school who later died of complications from HIV.

“Our responsibility is not only to protect children, but also to be what Isaiah called ‘the repairers of the breach,'” said cathedral Dean Rev. Randolph Hollerith. “We aim to offer healing to anyone who hurt, and to try and repair any breach of trust that was broken.”

This approach is in sharp contrast to the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia, which continues to refuse to even investigate allegations of perjury and other misconduct by Bob Malm, rector of Grace Episcopal Church in Alexandria. This refusal is based in part on advice from the diocesan chancellor, who also advised the diocese to ignore the canonical requirement of a pastoral response in the Title IV clergy disciplinary case at St. Thomas’, McLean.

Small wonder that the CANA/GAFCON crowd has little respect for the diocese of Virginia and church canons, when the diocese itself feels free to ignore the latter whenever it so suits.





Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Reminder: No Contact

It should be unnecessary, but as a reminder, I have specifically asked Bob Malm, in writing, to have no contact with me, either directly or through others. Moreover, no member of Grace Church, its vestry, or the diocese should contact me or Mike without my advance permission.

Anyone violating this request will be regarded as violating § 18.2-60.3 of the Virginia Code (Stalking; penalty), which inter alia provides:

“If the person contacts or follows or attempts to contact or follow the person at whom the conduct is directed after being given actual notice that the person does not want to be contacted or followed, such actions shall be prima facie evidence that the person intended to place that other person, or reasonably should have known that the other person was placed, in reasonable fear of death, criminal sexual assault, or bodily injury to himself or a family or household member.”


Wednesday, March 6, 2019

Grace Episcopal School: Is Your Child Safe?

Subtitle for this post: Grace Episcopal welcomes pedophiles and felons, but not bloggers.

One of the issues that Bob has created for both the church and the school is concern among parents about safety. With that in mind, let’s explore the issue, while recognizing that safety includes both physical safety and spiritual/emotional safety.

Physical safety

In the realm of physical safety, Bob likes to stir up fears about outsiders; his wife, Leslie, allegedly has told third parties that teachers at the school fear I will come in and “shoot up the place.” Leaving aside the fact that I am polygraphed, have a full background check that goes back much, much further than a federal security clearance, and have successfully passed the police psychological exam (all of which is a long way of saying that Bob is full of bullcrud), the reality is that children are most often injured or abused by people they know.

With that in mind, let’s look at who’s welcome at Grace Church. This includes the parish pedophile, who as discussed before both has boundary issues with children, as well as 24/7 access to the entire building, thus providing ample opportunities to be alone with a child.

But the bad news doesn’t stop there. Another parishioner committed felony theft, using keys belonging to a family member to steal multiple laptops. Yet Bob Malm declined to press charges, and to my knowledge did not inform the vestry that a felony theft had occurred. And yet that person has been alone in the building on multiple occasions since the theft.

Given these issues, were I a parent I’d have some real concerns, both about physical safety and about the security of personal belongings. Persons willing to engage in felony theft are, by definition, much more likely than the population at large to commit a variety of serious crimes. And the pedophile already has engaged in inappropriate behavior towards children; there are additional warning signs that I am not at liberty to share here.

Spiritual/emotional safety

To my mind, the most risky aspect of Grace Church and school is spiritual and emotional. Why? Because these can be insiduous, difficult to address, and hard to prevent.

In this space, Bob Malm aka Dysfunctional Bob is not a good instructor for the school’s religion courses, as his content is not age appropriate. This lack of calibration is troubling, for it suggests Bob may also not fully recognize that, to thrive, children need to be in a safe, emotionally healthy environment. 

In that regard, I have personally seen Bob’s tantrums, as well as his petty machinations and smear campaigns. Of course, the larger issue is what values children learn when they see a priest, a perceived authority figure, who:
  • Lies to others.
  • Engages in smear campaigns.
  • Manipulates people.
  • Commits perjury.
  • Bullies innocent family members (think Mike)
  • Tries to subpoena a dying parent in an effort to bully me.
  • Uses an attorney, Jeff “Sugarland” Chiow, who takes personal vendettas into the courtroom and deploys unprofessional,  inflammatory rhetoric.
In short, anything other than the most superficial contact with Dysfunctional Bob may well be unhealthy for children, and indeed the miasma Bob exudes may even touch children indirectly, as parishioners take their cues from Bob.

So next time Bob starts bloviating about fences, panic buttons, rekeying locks, and changing codes on alarm systems, my message to parents is this:

You should be far more concerned about the security risks inherent in welcoming felons and pedophiles to the building, and giving them 24/7 access to the facilities, than to Bob’s ludicrous claims that he’s been threatened. And don’t minimize the unseen risks to children  of Bob’s repeated ethics and boundary issues. If nothing else, Bob’s conduct carries with it an important message and damaging message, which is that bullying is okay.




Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Breaking News: The Episcopal Diocese of Virginia Again Refuses to Address Bob Malm’s Lies, Perjury and Abuse of Power

Earlier today, I received an email from the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia. There had been some discussions about resolving problems outside the Title IV disciplinary process, including a recommendation from Bishop Todd Ousley, the intake officer for the national church, that we consider this route. +Todd also noted that the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia has repeatedly failed to provide the pastoral response required under the canons. In today’s email, the diocese said it will not address Bob’s perjury outside of Title IV.

Given that the diocese repeatedly has said that it has no issue with Bob Malm’s actions, I intend to not deal any further with the diocese or Bob Malm’s lies. Instead, I will continue to publicly share this information, and let the chips fall where they may.

Small wonder organized religion is dying.

Here is a copy of Canon to the Ordinary Mary Thorpe’s previous letter on this issue.




Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Another Blast from the Past: Parishioner Urges Me to Commit Suicide

Here’s a post from a member of parishioner Lisa Medley’s family. Let’s just say that any family that claims to be “Christian” and thinks that BS like this is okay is one that I certainly hope will consider my name to be mud.

To make the irony even more delicious, this is something that Bob Malm attempted to assert in court somehow proved I had threatened him. If anything, it proves that Grace Church has threatened me.

Needless to say, proof that Grace is a toxic church.






Wednesday, February 20, 2019

Good Comment About Church Abuse

One theme that underlies every aspect of this conflict is Bob Malm’s efforts at gaslighting. The term gaslighting refers to trying to blame the cite of abuse by claiming that they are the abuser—as in claiming that I am a “domestic terrorist.” Gaslighting is, itself, considered a form of abuse, and it’s something I’ve seen Bob Malm engage in multiple times, including his multiple lies under oath (like claiming that my mother has made multiple appointments to meet him).

It’s interesting, too — Leslie and Lindsey Malm both try this tactic, as do Lisa and Lucy Medley. Further confirmation that Grace Church is toxic.

Here are comments on the topics of gaslighting and abuse posted by the Rev. Andrew Kadel in response to my recent article on Episcopal Cafe. See if it sounds familiar.

Eric, This is excellent in every way.  One thing that tends to muddle discussion and understanding of this, is under the rubric of "believe victims." One element of abuse is gaslighting, and an element of the gaslighting can be that the abuser poses as a victim. In the cold light of day, and when one steps back outside of the situation, it becomes clear that it is absurd, but for those who have an interest in shielding the abuser, it provides a rationale that is difficult to refute in heated situations. It's important to give credence to the stories of the abused which takes attention & compassion. The abusers, their sycophants & allies will always do things to make that difficult to do, including claiming that the victim is the abuser, or that the abuser is the victim.

The work of Wade Mullen, a baptist seminary professor, is very good on this. 
This is his Twitter: Wade Mullen @wad3mullen

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Attending Ash Wednesday Services at Grace Episcopal Church?

If so, be sure to ask Dysfunctional Bob Malm and Sugarland Chiow what Jesus thinks about bullying the dying by trying to drag them into court.

And if you’re not seeing repentance from both, have the courage to admit you’ve been played, that it’s just a job for Dysfunctional Bob, take a pass, and move on. Either find a real church, versus a religious club, or take a pass on organized religion altogether.




Saturday, February 16, 2019

Grace Governance Gaps: Trouble in the Offing

In previous posts, I reported on the various governance gaps at Grace Church. With the church presently working towards replacing its HVAC systems, and to obtain funding for this project, I believe it’s timely to revisit these issues. Most importantly, I want to flag for readers a big issue, which is that there’s a huge governance gap in the breakdown in communication between the school board and the vestry.

To begin, serving on the vestry creates a fiduciary legal obligation on the part of vestry members. This means putting aside one’s own interests and acting according to the highest legal and ethical standards in the interests of the beneficiary. In this case, the beneficiary is the parish itself.

This obligation, which includes the obligations of due diligence and reasonable inquiry, is reflected (albeit poorly) in written parish policy, which requires that the executive committee see school board minutes and the school’s financial reports. This in itself does not go far enough, for the school is part and parcel of the parish, and has no existence independent of the church. Thus, the fiduciary obligation of vestry members extends to all vestry members, not just those on the executive committee.

That said, the practice in recent years has been to ignore those requirements, with only Dysfunctional Bob Malm seeing these school documents. That’s hardly reassuring, as Dysfunctional Bob allowed church financials to become a hot mess over a period of years, as acknowledged in the vestry’s own minutes more than a year after Charlotte Payne Wright’s departure as parish administrator. Nor was he alert to potential problems; director of music Richard Newman was overpaid for many months before the matter was discovered by then-director-of-parish-operations Jeff “Airhead” Aaron. As a result, Richard was forced to repay the sum, despite the fact that he was hardly overpaid at the time. Moreover, the news may have had a deleterious effect on the relationship between Dysfunctional Bob and Jeff, as shortly after Jeff broke the news things appear to have gone south for Jeff, and a few months later he transitioned to a new job.

Of course, Dysfunctional Bob is quick to say, “Well, I see them.” But that’s exactly the point: Leaving Dysfunctional Bob in charge of money or financial reporting is worse than no supervision at all, for it gives the illusion of security, despite the evidence that Bob is feckless at best when it comes to these issues.

To make matters worse, when I brought the matter up, the vestry subsequently decided it didn’t need to see these documents, as it might make the school board feel that it’s not trusted. Big mistake. One cannot readily delegate away one’s fiduciary obligation as a vestry member, and saying, “Well, I trusted Bob and the school board,” isn’t going to cut it. Too bad Jeff “Sugarland” Chiow didn’t wade in on this issue — it would have been a far better use of his time versus subsequently trying to drag dying people into court. And yes, I am referring to my mother.

So what exactly is the risk? My take on it is that school internal controls are good—certainly vastly better than the almost non-existent controls at the church. Instead, issues are more likely to come up in the context of errors, omissions, and misunderstandings. For example, I have heard school board members glibly say of the parish budget, “We won’t have a deficit if we move money over from reserves.” Well, yes, you will still have a deficit. Money from reserves is not income, and you will still have a deficit, no matter how you choose to cover the bills.

So what could happen? I’d say the biggest risk is that the school incurs liability that could attach to the church. For instance, an incident of child sexual abuse would, even if covered by insurance, prove devastating for both church and school. And heaven knows, there are gaps a mile wide in both the church’s and the school’s prevention efforts. So while Dysfunctional Bob stirs the pot with fears of an active shooter (a phrase that he likely didn’t even know in 2014), the far greater threat is internal misconduct.

Similarly, a bad investment decision by the school could result in liability for the church. To use a real-life example from another non-profit with which I am familiar, suppose the school took out a loan containing a derivative. These are surprisingly common, and if the school’s loan contained an interest rate swap, versus a cap or collar, it could soon be on the hook for millions of dollars in payments. As I said, this happened to one prominent northern Virginia non-profit, with devastating results, and all because the executive director did not have adequate board supervision.

Needless to say, these risks are exacerbated by the church’s present precarious financial position. As I have said many times, cash reserves are far too thin for comfort and structural costs far too high, including the fact that 1 out of every 5 dollars the church pulls in goes into Bob Malm’s pockets. What’s really telling, too, is that the church has lost more than a third of its pledging units at a time when the Northern Virginia population is growing. Thus, the church is in a period of precipitous decline, despite the fact that the community around it is burgeoning.

As I have said before, Grace’s woes are compounded by the fact that Dysfunctional Bob must, under church canons, retire within the next few years. Such events are inevitably problematic, but all the more so when, as here, 1) Bob has stayed for more than 30 years and 2) Bob has created a narcissistic paradigm that focuses people’s attention on him and the church, versus on God. Pull Dysfunctional Bob out of the toxic crock of goo and there will be a hot mess on the diocese’s hands in record time.

To make matters still worse, the parish has very few real leaders. Real leaders tend to leave once they understand the problems at Planet Malm, replaced by sycophants, enablers and admirers who allow Bob to pretty much do as he pleases — a paradigm that Dysfunctional Bob both encourages and exploits. Thus, with Bob gone, there will be no meaningful plan B. And the true leaders in the parish simply don’t have the sway to influence the Planet Malm drone population.

So, a shout-out to candidates for assistant rector and potential lenders everywhere: Look before you leap. Things are gonna get ugly on Planet Malm in the next few years. Guaranteed.






Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Gossip at Grace: Another Sign of an Unhealthy Church

Remember when I posted the comment by a parish employee about how Bob Malm, aka Dysfunctional Bob, not only permits inappropriate discourse, but tacitly endorses it, by engaging in a certain amount of it himself? Well, in addition the the spectacularly bad example he and Sugarland Chiow have established in dealing with me, the reality is that, right behind the scenes, there’s lots of ugly discourse at Grace Church. 

To be fair, if you just show up on Sundays and hang out at coffee hour, you may never run into it. But I assure you, it’s alive and well. And its presence serves as a bellwether for the overall health of the parish.

A few good ones that I’ve heard:
  • Comments and speculation about one parishioner having a penile implant. (Seriously.)
  • Rumors about a recently married parishioner actually being gay — which is interesting, because that person is not a particularly good choice when it comes to defamation. I’ll leave it at that.
  • The endless speculation about infidelity and adultery in the parish.
  • Leslie Steffensen’s comments about me and money. Needless to say, I know who the source of those comments is.
  • Kemp Williams’ stupid comments about me.
Then there’s the use of gossip as a weapon, as I observed first-hand with Alison Campbell’s efforts to cause problems for me within the altar guild. And Lisa Medley’s post on The Wartburg Watch about my alleged $.02 donation. Yes, there was such a donation, but no, it was not mine, and it was not to the church. One would hope that Lisa would at least get her details right.

That said, the upshot is that when people use gossip as a weapon, that’s telling, for it’s only an effective weapon if people are receptive to it. And those who engage in it clearly have little concept of the damage they do to the church as a whole.

Sadly, it only takes a few to cause lasting harm to the parish.

Saturday, February 9, 2019

Another Sign Dysfunctional Bob Has Stayed too Long

Some time ago, I touched on Joe McKeever’s excellent article, “Ten Signs the Pastor or Employee has Been There too Long.” While written from an SBC perspective, its key points hold true, regardless of denomination. And the tenth point, which I didn’t previously discuss, is particularly true in Dysfunctional Bob’s case. That point is that it’s time for the rector to go when he or she is willing to destroy the church in order to protect themselves. (Those interested may find the full article here.)

In Dysfunctional Bob’s case, his efforts to get at me, by his own admission in his written settlement proposal, have damaged the church. At this point in time, it’s hard to gauge how lasting the harm will be, but given the demographics of the parish, Bob’s lack of initiative, and the extent conflict lurking right below the surface in the church, it’s difficult to see things getting better for the church any time soon. Indeed, within the next 20 years the vast majority of the current congregation will be dead and gone. And long before that point numbers will soon drop to where the overhead associated with the  building will be more than the parish can sustain.

That begs the issue: Why, after almost 4 years, is Bob still pursuing his vendetta? Why has he included Mike in his vendetta? And my mother, now very close to the end of life?

The answer, I believe, is that Bob is a priest in name only. Jesus modeled health, wholeness, reconciliation, and welcoming the oppressed. Bob models none of these things, but rather their opposites.

Nor will Bob’s departure readily repair things. Over the years, Bob has taught parishioners a model of conduct that includes threatening and bullying others, urging people to commit suicide, and in the case of Kirk Steffensen and members of Dysfunctional Bob’s family, threatening people’s jobs. One has only to look at the smug, self-satisfied emails of parishioners like Kemp Williams and Easter Thompson to see how thin faith really is at Grace Church. Nor do these or myriad other examples indicate that parishioners actually have enough introspection to recognize their facially shallow faith. That said, I’ll drop a hint: If you haven’t taken steps to resolve this conflict, you should be asking yourself some tough questions. Second hint: If you’re okay with Bob giving Mike the heave-ho, then you’ve really got issues. Third hint: Trying to drag the dying into court. 

Of course, it’s a pretty sad state of affairs when Jeff “Sugarland” Chiow, hardly a model of ethical conduct with his inflammatory pleadings and false statements of fact to the Virginia courts, occupies the high moral ground apropos Bob by virtue of having made a settlement offer on his client’s behalf. That said, Sugarland’s offer was a legal maneuver; there was no aspect of the Christian faith set forth within.

These issues will create a problematic future for the parish. Young people today have scant use for organized faith under the best of circumstances, and the ugly rhetoric involving “domestic terrorism” coming out of the parish, the pursuit of a dying woman, and Bob’s bullying evince a faith for which most young people have little use. Indeed, the decline in pledging units and Sunday attendance at Grace Church suggests that many already at Grace have little use for Bob’s religious world views, which can best be summarized as the conflation of “friendly,” with “faithful.”

Nor should one discount the disappearance of many past stalwarts of the church. Quite a few, indeed many friends, have left the church, often on relatively bad terms. Yes, the front door is wide open and you’ll be welcomed with open arms, but the back door is open far wider, and folks are just as happy to point you in that direction if it suits them—another sign of organizational narcissism.

Going forward, Grace Church would be wise to place a clause in its letter of agreement requiring 1) an annual review of the rector 2) an annual mutual ministry review 3) a requirement that the rector adhere to all canonical and local community policies and regulations and 4) face an annual secret ballot, by the vestry, on whether to continue the contract after 10 years. This should include a provision that if such a vote is not held, then the contract terminates automatically.

Term limits are good, and that’s true for both priests and presidents.


Wednesday, February 6, 2019

More Observations on Integrity and the Church

Over the past week, I’ve been working on a number of matters related to this conflict. One of the themes that keeps popping up as I review material, correspondence and other related documentation is the extent to which the church still doesn’t get it. Specifically, Bob Malm, Jeff Chiow and the rest of the St. Dysfunction crowd continue to view the issue through the lens of power and control.

In other words, if Bob had his druthers, he’d be able to push people out of the church any time he wanted to, lie whenever he wanted to, go on vacation any time he wanted to, and have no one say a thing. Unless the response was, “Thank you Sir, may I have another?”

In fact, Bob, Leslie Malm and others are still trying to find ways to shut down criticism. They still seem to think that if they just find the right strategy, or tell the right lie, somehow the criticism will stop. 

It won’t.

It’s interesting too. Not only do Bob and his family not appear to realize when they are lying, but when they are asked about it, they either try denying everything, or they don’t answer. For example, Dysfunctional Bob claims he didn’t lie during the meeting with +Shannon, despite the fact he did so in front of witnesses.

Similarly, when Lying Leslie Malm was asked about her false claim that I admitted that Mom’s blog is really mine, she simply didn’t respond.

In short, St. Dysfunction is a seriously toxic church, and things are going to get worse as it becomes obvious to more and more people that this is the case.

Tough times ahead for the church.

Friday, February 1, 2019

Bob Malm Attends PB Sermon “Love is the Only Way”

Here’s an amusing one. 

Dysfunctional Bob recently was sighted over at Episcopal High School, where he listened to a sermon by the presiding bishop, Michael Curry, “Love is the Only Way.” 

Trying to drag the dying into court? Calling your former members “domestic terrorists?” Lying in court? Perjury?

I doubt Bob even saw the irony.

Bob and the PB were a year apart in divinity school.




Tuesday, January 29, 2019

See for Yourself: Bob Malm Contradicts Himself in Email Exchange With Easter Thompson

Here’s another good one from Bob Malm. On the one hand, Bob went to court, claiming that folks at Grace were “terrorized” by my Mom’s blog, which he claims I wrote. Yet in this email exchange with parishioner Easter Thompson, he claims no one at the church takes me seriously. So which is it?

Of course, Bob made a similar statement in January to the bishop, in which he said that his wife and daughter both take this more seriously than they should.

In the meantime, that begs the question: How did Easter Thompson get it in her head that my assertions are not based on fact/truth? Leaving aside the fact that I don’t recall God assigning Easter the role of “judge of all men,” there is written documention of almost every issue, ranging from Bob’s illegal use of restricted solicitations, to his bullying, to his order to parish staff to shun and exclude us, to his courtroom perjury. Nor do I see Easter making any effort to resolve the conflict, yet she proclaims herself a Christian.

Interesting that Easter is so comfortable passing judgment on others when she has no firsthand knowledge of the matter. It’s perhaps telling too that Bob felt no need to invoke the vestry prior to his decision to shun us. It’s only when he got pushback that he decided to pull in the vestry—a vestry that he has, on more than one occasion, apparently lied to, as evinced by the vestry’s “talking points,” in which he claims that we left on our own. If that’s the case, why then did Bob admit to the contrary during the meeting with the bishop?

No wonder people are abandoning organized religion. And you surely have to wonder what Easter’s objection is to the Anglican Consultative Commission’s work.

In the meantime, Easter, if you’re sick of stuff like my work on the Anglican Consultative Commission’s efforts, don’t friggin’ read it. And if you object to my actions, Easter, how about having the integrity to share your concerns directly with me, versus triangulating with Bob? It’s called having a spine. 

Ditto for Kemp Williams and his comments.






Monday, January 28, 2019

Just Help Pay for the Air Conditioning...

We’ll take good care of your investment.

Photo taken summer 2013 of a vesting room window that hadn’t been cleaned in 4 years; the date on the Easter Vigil bulletin confirms this.

I sent this to both Bob Malm and the parish admin. The latter said she wasn’t sure that anyone cleans the vesting rooms. Bob Malm didn’t bother to respond.

On a related note, the existing double condensing boilers were not properly maintained following Mike Hix’s death, with the water line additive that prevents premature corrosion of the boilers allowed to run out. Additionally, the HVAC maintenance company that serviced the building until 2013 didn’t even do commercial properties and had no idea how to use the building control system, while Chris Byrnes repeatedly screwed the system up by manually opening and closing HVAC valves operated by the building control system. Does the word “cluster,” come to mind?

Your pledges at work!




Sunday, January 27, 2019

Coming Soon: Body Cam Footage

Late next week, I plan to release a very special treat for readers: Body cam footage. That’s right—your chance to see the good christians of Grace Church yelling the f bomb, flipping me the finger, and more. And yes, I include names and license plate photos. And yes, it is legal to film in a public arena, before you ask. Speaking of, I have a couple of juicy audio recordings of key people dropping the f bomb, lying and more. (Virginia is a one-party consent jurisdiction, before folks go running to Sugarland. And yes, I or another relevant party consented in all cases.)

Nor is Grace Episcopal School (GES) excluded. In fact, some of my best footage comes from GES parents. Release of this will be delayed for a few weeks while I work on my unofficial “Begin With Grace” video. Depending on how busy the next few months are, I may also do a “God’s Grace for All,” video about the church. But all this depends on several variables beyond my control.

So, not only will those be posted in a special gallery, but they’ll be out on social media, for all the world to see. Folks from Bill Eckel to Amy Medrick, and several more.

Fun times on Planet Malm!

Ministry? Or Business?

Very true. Grace Episcopal is a business, not a church, and a badly run business at that.